


Into The Window

by ArisenFromNightmares



Category: Professional Wrestling
Genre: Confessional, Drabble, Gen, Rants
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-18
Updated: 2018-12-30
Packaged: 2019-02-16 10:05:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 9,821
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13051815
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArisenFromNightmares/pseuds/ArisenFromNightmares
Summary: Even small wrestling promotions have spirited champions. Some are proud to hold their gold, others seek a redemption they have yet to find, these are their confessionals.





	1. Suicide Run

My name is Roujiro Kurisamé, and I am the current Blitz League SUPER Champion

I made my debut back in February of 2016 and since then..it’s been a nightmare of a ride.

I remember my debut being as something of a surprise opponent for then International Champion, Yoko Tachibana. Honestly, I was elated to get my first shot in, but coming out to _Last Surprise_ from _Persona 5_?

Somebody had to be fucking ribbing me, but I competed as best I could..and got totally smoked.

I should probably explain just what the fuck Blitz League is before you turn away from this little diatribe of mine.

Blitz League is sort of an outlaw wrestling promotion started by some goof who was bored out of his mind, originally called Digi-League wrestling back in 2002, they literally ripped every WWE Championship and tried to make like it meant something.

Back then, we ran off those damn video games and recruited anybody we could: fairies from _Winx Club,_ other anime shows, you get the drift.

But that meant matches went to fucking draws, ridiculously long title reigns, and just all kinds of fuckery.

But that’s not why I’m here today, you want history? Go read a fucking textbook

I’m a goddamn champion, and unlike most of my fellow champions I get the least amount of recognition. Back in the “Unified” days I was tossed opponent after opponent.

Why? Because back then we had weird joint status rules with other companies, anytime _Impact Wrestling_ had a Grand Championship defense, when _WCPW_ had an Internet Title match, and on the rare occasion a part-timer in _WWE_ decided to defend the Universal Championship, it meant that I had to step up.

And you best believe that I fucking stepped up! I stepped up when I broke Ganessa Roland’s nose before winning **my** title from that rich brat’s hands, I stepped up when management decided to open our doors to those other companies.

I put Moose through a fucking burning table when people gave me no chance, I fought a war with that pompous ball sack Joe Hendry, and I made him take his “Prestige” and shove it up his ass!

  I went blow for blow with the “Kiwi Buzzsaw” Travis Banks and survived to tell the tale, yet **he** goes on to become not only PROGRESS Champion, but also the 3rd (and current) Blitz League Heavyweight Champion.

OUR belt! OUR Company! And an OUTSIDER represents us!

And yet a homegrown champion like me gets relegated to jerking the curtain in the opening contest, or made to look like some lovesick goon over whatever pair of tits happens to be holding our Women’s Championship.

I may have been on the roster for almost two years, but I’ve bled buckets for this place!

Ryuji Sakamoto and I have busted each other open in the two times we’ve met in this ring, I consider the man a brother and, yet management lets folks like Dalton Castle and fucking Rob Conway waltz in and take key spots in our thirty-man Battle Royale.

Plenty of talented men and women bust their asses to prove that they’re more then whatever they were in their home world, not just heroes or villains but certifiable athletes who just want some recognition!

You wanna know how I spent my Sunday? While you and yours were rushing through the department stores looking for Christmas presents, I was getting beaten to hell and back by WCPW’s Primate!

Yes, I know it’s called **Defiant** Wrestling now. But I’m not letting Whatculture get away unblemished because I sure as hell didn’t, Primate certainly lives up to his name.

But I survived, and I’ve been picking splinters out of my scalp since then.

Not that management cares, I’m not gonna see another defense until January anyhow.

So let this be an announcement of a suicide run, I plan to fight tooth and nail for the rest of the next year.

Starting January 1st of 2018, I take no fucking prisoners! I don’t care if you’re a jobber, the winningest champion on our roster ( _Killer Instinct’s_ TJ Combo hasn’t lost a Television title match since August) someone I shared a bed with, or even the General Manager himself.

I will wreck you, I will bust you open and make you don a crimson mask before I put your lights out!

I am going to keep an iron grip on this meaningless championship and make it RELEVANT! Come Hell or high water, me and this SUPER Championship **will** main event Wrestle Festival 3 and I don’t care if it’s Cinder Fall, Daniel Bryan, or even the reanimated corpse of “Macho Man” Randy Savage himself. No one is going to take it from me!

And come New Years Eve 2018, I will **DIE** as the longest reigning SUPER Champion!

…I don’t know if my fellow champions will make use of this confessional, and personally speaking, I don’t fucking care!

I’ve said my piece, whether or not you wanna know more.

That’s on you.

 


	2. Some (not so) SUPER #1 Contenders

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The SUPER Champ hogs the Confessional to complain about recent developments

Hey, SUPER Champ here again.

So today was quite the event for our little wannabe fed, our newest Tag Team Champions (who you’ll hear from later down the road) managed to make their first successful title defense against the team of Kyoko Sakura & Sayaka Miki.

Don’t let anyone tell you that ladies can’t hold their own in the ring, blood was spilled during that war and yet Thunder Dragon pulled it out.

Personally, I pity the next tag team who decide to step up to those two.

Then there’s the never-ending conga line of qualifying matches for our 30-person Battle Royale (That’s right folks, men AND women slugging it out for a spot to main event Wrestle-Festival 3. We wanted to call it WrestleCircus, but that name was already taken.) and today’s qualifier was a bit of a mess, a returning Rana Linchen ended up facing “The Demon Queen” Demetria Schnee.

Now I bet you’re wondering: Champ, where’s the issue? You said the royale was open to Men AND Women, and on that note, you’re 150% correct dear viewer.

The problem’s with our so-called Schnee, she thought she was being smart by trying to fool the system and use her mommy’s last name along with an alias.

See, she was **born** with the name Alicia Verdandi Moonlight.

Moonlight, that name carries a lot of heat in our locker room thanks to daddy not-so dearest: Bálor Moonlight, despised philanderer, noted cheater, had zero problem fucking/bribing/and even blackmailing his way to the top and trying to stay there.

When he got fired, Management banned any and ALL of his relatives were banned from competing in our ring.

A simple background check could’ve caught that kind of rookie mistake.

The most important part to this day however went to yours truly. See, Management has finally woken up to the fact that everybody they’ve thrown at me ends up broken

Ganessa Roland, self-entitled brat that she was. Crumpled under the weight of her first title defense from a “no good, discount Phantom Thief”

_“For the love of God! Kurisamé just busted her open with that running kick!”_

“ _Future Shock DDT! 1-2-3, we have a New SUPER Champion!!!”_

Attia Simmons, she knew she couldn’t hang with me at True Destiny so she brought together a “family” to win for her.

“ _Well folks it looks like this one’s all wrapped up in the bag for Kurisamé- H-hey wait a minute! What the hell?! Creo Brand, Ciel Alcenon- th-the Tag Team Champions are attacking Roujiro Kurisamé!”_

“ _Oh c’mon! Now the International champ is getting in on the action, “Protector of Order” my ass! Ingrid Berstein is just being a thug!”_

“Too bad for her, that plan backfired at our weird Saturday Spectacular: C&C got knocked off by the unlikely duo of Cinder Fall & Crow Hogan (who themselves got knocked off a week later) Ingrid got taken out by Max Tate, and Attia was the sacrifice to begin “The Kiwi Buzzsaw’s” reign of terror.”

* _Knocking is heard outside the confessional door*_

“Alright! Alright! Five more minutes!”

Apparently, my fellow champs do wanna make use of this thing, but lack the virtue of **patience.**

  Today management decided to throw me in a three way dance, with my challengers being Da Xian Wang: The pompous jackass who retired after WINNING this title, and now that things are suddenly coming up roses for us he wants to win back the title he “never lost”.

Then there’s Jaune Arc.

I genuinely like the guy, he was our very first champion under the “Unified” rules and the crowd loses their shit anytime his entrance music starts playing (this goes double for the ladies in the crowd.) so I’m positively tickled pink for him to be a part of the first leg of my “Suicide Run”

Remember folks, I’m gonna DIE as Champion!

Kurisamé, out.


	3. Bullet in the Chamber Fallout (part one)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A return to the confessional with a newly crowned two-time champion

“Been a while hasn’t it folks?”

_Roujiro sits on the confessional stool, his head bandaged up while calmly holding the SUPER Championship on his shoulder._

“Sorry for the long delay, bit of a shift in management again and they didn’t want any of us “wrestlers” talking. For the record..I LOST to Jaune back in January and man did it suck.”

_Footage of Battle Royale’s triple threat match is shown, Kurisamé hits Da Xian with the Claymore kick and lets out a roar of triumph. From behind, Jaune Arc gets the champ up and lays him out with the Lumbar Check before making the pin._

One. Two! THREE!!!

“ _Holy shit folks, I think Hell just froze over! Jaune Arc is SUPER Champion!”_

_An elated Jaune holds up his newly won prize and points up to the heavens, having dedicated the match to his friends, his family, and to his fallen love. Tears streaming down his face triumphantly._

“Fucking beautiful isn’t it? If you squint and look in the corner you’ll see my dumb ass slinking away like a beaten mutt, but that was his first mistake…he tried to get in the way of my suicide run!”

_Footage cuts to a manic looking Roujiro beating up anyone and everyone in his way._

_“Jauney-boy!!! I’m getting my title back!”_

_The new promoter: Hifumi Togo, would watch on in annoyance as the rampage continued. “I’m scheduling a rematch: Kurisamé vs Arc..and six others, in an ELITE EIGHT ELIMINATION CHAMBER!”_

_Roujiro does a facepalm while looking at the footage, wincing as he works a kink out of his shoulder._

“Apparently, we’re STUPIDER than the WWE, but it happened. I mean for FUCK’S SAKE, I **JUST** WALKED OUT WITH THE BELT!”

 _He would pause to wince in pain as he looks at the belt, clutching the leather with a mixture of pride and shame._ “I meant what I said: I’m going to end my life as a champion, it doesn’t matter if I have to go through Elimination Chambers, exploding death matches, friends, family. I know how my story’s gonna end-“

_A soft tapping on the Confessional door is heard in the background, interrupting the young man’s tear-filled speech._

“That’s my cue, she doesn’t like it when I try and run from the trainers and med staff. But rest assured, I won’t be the only champion you hear from this time. Women’s and Tag Team belts are up for grabs too.”

_Footage of tonight’s Chamber match is aired as Roujiro, Jaune, and the others are shown fighting each other. A picture of a bloody and battered Jaune being stretchered out would be highlighted, followed by a brutal spear from Puru Two driving K-Sha through a Chamber Pod._

_But the man wouldn’t be denied as he hit a powerbomb on the orange-haired clone and reclaimed what was his, even though his next challenge awaited on the fledgling promotion’s grandest stage._

COME ON! Roujiro Kurisamé, onto Wrestle-Festival III!


	4. Bullet In The Chamber Fallout (Part Two)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Blitz League's longest reigning champ lays down the law, and makes a bold declaration...

_Footage of the main event from B.I.T.C.’s night one starts us off, the crowd is in a roaring frenzy of boos as the reigning Television champion (as well as former Ultratech Heavyweight Boxing Champion) T.J. Combo stands over his latest challenger, although it would be his first (and only) title defense since the month of November._

_“The crowd is incensed! It’s been six months since Combo won the title and yet you’d think that this was his great triumph, but the people are just-“_

_“No! No! I’ll tell you what this is, it’s a miscarriage of justice! This rich fuckhead gets to take three months off to shoot a movie while everyone else goes night after night busting their asses in this ring for a shot at a champion that won’t even bother to show up!”_

_The sound system loudly starts to play Mick Gordon’s “I’m Back (to Rise!) in order to drown out the crowd’s fury, although they would retaliate by now pelting the departing champ and his entourage with popcorn, soda, and whatever else they had on hand._

_“Calling T.J. Combo a champion is an insult to all of the men and women who put in the time here! He’s a punk. He’s a cheat. A no good, fucking ni-“_

_The footage cuts off here, the camera zooming in on a less-than-thrilled Combo._

“..Ya know, I never did like those goofballs on commentary. But that’s beside the point, I just spent three months in a fucking wasteland shooting some B level action schlock, trying to get some eyes on this two-bit shit show.” The man pats the title hung over his shoulder roughly as he continues to glare into the camera, his rugged looks seemingly unfazed by the brief title defense he had fought. “They think I checked out, that I don’t care, that I’m just in this for the cash since I got banned from a REAL sport!”

_The champ spits at the camera, a very real anger brewing underneath his bulky frame as the wad of spit lands onto the lens and obscures the visual for the remainder of this segment._

“I thought I told you when I won the strap: You want a shot? Then be a man and step up to the champ! Ain’t no need for hashtags, petitions, or any other social media bullshit. You grow a set and come get some!” _Combo stands up suddenly, the stool beneath him skidding to the floor as he steps forward to the camera, holding the second lowest tier belt in the Blitz League’s lineup._

“One-hundred eighty-five days. That’s how long I’ve held this strap and, I’ve taken on every man, woman, and freak show who thought they had what it takes to stand in that ring with a real athlete!” _A fist is thrown but stops short of hitting the camera, the barest hints of fresh bruises could be seen as it is pulled back._ “And now that I’m back, I see that we’re now being led by some shogi-playing know-it-all skank who thinks that organizing a tournament to find a new contender to my belt will finally take me down!”

_A furious Combo grabs the camera from its stand and wipes the spit off, giving a cold stare into it._

“Well consider this a message from a REAL champion: You can send the entire damn roster after me, and it wouldn’t make a fucking difference! I’m never gonna surrender this belt, and unlike that fucking kiwi Travis Banks, who seems to enjoy holding our so-called Heavyweight Championship hostage while he travels the globe defending his other prizes. I think a change is in order!”

_The camera is carefully laid down on the stool as a defiant T.J. holds up his championship._

“As of right now, I’m declaring this little beauty the WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT Television Championship. Because everybody in this shitshow of a company knows that I’m a REAL Heavyweight Champion, and anybody who’s got a problem with it…they can come get these hands!”

_A major declaration from a champion who feels disrespected by the company he fights for, will Hifumi allow this impromptu championship upgrade? Or is the Champ in for a rude awakening??_

COME ON! Combo! World Champ or bust!!!


	5. Bullet In The Chamber fallout (Part Three)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tag Team Champs doing what they do best: Stirring up shit, and acting saucy.

**_Before we begin this next segment, we at the Blitz League would like to issue a formal apology for the abhorrent and biased commentary of Kurt Michelob following T.J. Combo’s television title defense. While we in the company understand that Mr. Michelob came to us from the “shock jock” lifestyle, that is no excuse for the use of a racial slur directed at any of our competitors regardless of the reason, and Mr. Michelob’s contract with the League has since been terminated. We apologize if anyone reading at home was offended by our former commentator’s actions, and now return you to your regularly scheduled segment._ **

* * * * *

_Footage of tonight’s Tag Team title match opens with Yang Xiao Long and Chie Satonaka crawling towards they respective corner for a live-saving tag._

_“This has been one of the most punch-happy tag team matches I’ve seen, but it looks like things may finally pick up at last!”_

_As Chie finally makes the tag to Yukiko and the crowd roars to life, a certain sunny little dragon is shocked to find her own partner dropping from the apron and giving her the “one-gun salute”._

_“What the hell?! Velvet Crowe is walking out on the match! Why? Goddammit tell me why?!”_

_“Calm down Jackson, this is Yang we’re talking about. She should be used to her partners abandoning her!”_

_The match ends quickly as the defending champions lay out their challenger with Chasing the Dragon and a merciful three count._

_Fast forward to our champs laughing it up inside the confessional booth._

“Oh my God that was hilarious! What the heck was blondie thinking trying to tag with the least social woman in the locker room, she had to know that shit was coming!” _Chie would hold her title belt haphazardly while the Amagi Inn’s soon-to-be manager just laughed uncontrollably, as usual not even being punched in the face couldn’t impede her laughing fit._

“Snnrrrk!!! That stupid bimbo thought she could make some great statement by trying to take our titles, as if beating us is gonna change the fact that her mother’s a habitual runaway and her father will fuck anything that’s on the same team with him!” _Amagi leans in close and licks her lips seductively. “_ That’s right kiddies, the QrowxTaiyang sex tape is real. And it’s hella kinky!” _Yukiko proceeds to burst out in a new fit of laughter before falling off the stool entirely, leaving Chie to squat down in front of the camera with a serious expression._

“Now, word on the street is that the Kamishiro twins want the next shot at our titles. Mind you, these are the same twins who FAILED to grab singles gold on this very show. I mean how the fuck do you lose to a part-timer like T.J. for crying out loud, that’s like a new level of pathetic!”

_Yukiko comes into view, lazily draping her arms over Yukiko’s shoulder and giving a saucy wink to the camera._

“See, we warned you when we debuted back in November that there wasn’t a tag team in this place that could hang with me and Chie, and the fact that we’re undefeated should **clearly** make us not only the best tag team on this roster but the best tag team in the world today!” _Yukiko would pause to give her tag team partner and best friend a peck on the cheek._

“So as far as the twins are concerned, you can take your little challenge and go fuck off. We don’t waste our precious time on losers who can’t even win on their own!” _The two women would hold their respective championships up to the camera, obscuring their faces._

“We are the Undisputed! We don’t take shit from anybody, so consider your system..SHOCKED!!!” _The champs make their way outta the booth still laughing, even as Yukiko once again looks back at the camera mouthing something before winking._

_They are a tag team that’s gone unrivaled since day one, riding high on a wave of momentum that began with a shock victory over then-longest reigning champions Aki Izayoi and Futaba Sakura. Is there anyone who can hope to best this ferocious feminine force?_

COME ON! Undisputed! Bring on the next challengers!


	6. Bullet In The Chamber Fallout (Finale)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A new queen sits at the top of the Women's division, and she's in no mood to take prisoners!

_The final segment of this monthly extravaganza follows the completion of Bullet In The Chamber’s main event for the second (and final) night: A six woman match for the Women’s Championship. To some in the League; it’s a relic of days gone by as all titles are available to be challenged for by both sexes, and while this can certainly muddy up the title picture quite a bit, it also shows that this humble little promotion is truly a land of opportunity._

“Is this thing on?” _An exhausted Makoto Niijima does her best to look presentable despite having endured a war, dressed in an outfit better suited to dancing than fighting but she was also sporting a new accessory to her ensemble: **Her** Women’s Championship. _“Ah, there’s the red light. Guess we’re good to go.” _The brunette-haired woman crosses her leg demurely before leveling her gaze at the camera, her expression cold and serious._

“I’d like to go on record and state that I wore this outfit on a bet, a close friend of mine was sure that I wouldn’t dare wear this kind of outfit in a crowd.” She would pause to giggle and drape her newly won prize across her lap, a knowing smile gracing her lips. “In fact, he was so sure that he offered to pay for our group’s dinner tonight. And I’m certainly feeling like a top-tier meal after that craziness.” _The champ’s stomach would growl in agreement as she wiped the remains of a hard night’s sweat from her brow, silently reflecting on the weight of her most recent victory._ “I honestly wasn’t expecting to even make it into this match, my qualifying match was actually supposed to be the culmination of a very infuriating rivalry with..someone who shall remain nameless. Even then, no one gave me a shot. Not even the betting odds in Vegas had me pegged as a winner, joke’s on them though because a thousand to one longshot bet pays off big!”

_Niijima’s expression would turn ice cold as she strapped the Women’s Championship around her waist, balling a fist tightly as she continued to glare at the camera as if to square up to her naysayers._

“The last time I held a championship in this company, so many people were quick to get into my face and tell me that I didn’t belong in the same ring as them. That a “little girl” like me should shut her mouth and stay in the PROPER division, well now I stand at the top: The Queen now sitting on her throne!” _Makoto would yank the camera free from its stand and look dead down the lens, the iron-fisted rider who helped lead the Phantom Thieves through the Metaverse now replacing the mild-mannered woman from earlier._ “But this Queen isn’t satisfied with just ruling her kingdom, so this one’s going out to you: The so-called “Kiwi Buzzsaw” Travis Banks. I’m so **sick** of you ducking out of your challenges, you cite commitments to PROGRESS, Defiant, and a dozen other places as the reason for not defending the Heavyweight Championship outside of a monthly special.”

_She would pause to take a calming breath, even as her red-eyed gaze sharpened into something more feral._

“You can’t run forever Travis, and when you do decide to grow a set and come back and grace us with your presence..you’d better be ready to bow to The Queen!” _A knock on the confessional door would only enrage the woman further, grabbing the stool she had been sitting on and flinging it at the door with her free hand and sending whoever was on the other side running for the hills. “_ One last piece of business. Arnett McMillan, the unfortunate number one contender to my title. As far as I’m concerned, you’re just another subject in need of punishment!”

_Niijima sets the camera down as gently as her angered state would allow her to, moving the stool out of her way before opening the door to the confessional booth._

“I’m in the mood for prime rib bitches!!!”

_We end the night with two new champions, the possibility of a “World Heavyweight” Television Championship, and a number of people gunning for an absentee champion! But the advent of the Queen will not be overshadowed, for while she dines on steak tonight she remains dead set on hunting down a Kiwi!_

COME ON! Queen! Make your Iron-fisted Justice known to the world!


	7. The Worst Press Conference EVER!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A press conference for an upcoming event leads to a quick derailing and a shocking announcement.

_The scene opens on a mostly empty conference area as a stoic Hifumi Togo takes the stage with press notes in hand, it wasn’t her first time in front of such a crowd as she had done such interviews during her time as an aspiring “Shogi Idol”, one of her mother’s ideas to gain notoriety as well as money to support their family._

“Relax boss, you’ve got this. Just a nice and simple rundown of the card, then answering some lame-duck questions.” _The warm and encouraging smile of the woman formerly known as Android 21 would help calm the brunette’s nerves, although it still floored her that the Blitz League’s major investors had pegged the two of them specifically to helm the promotion._

“Thank you for being here today, as you know this weekend we’ll be hosting another event for our League known as Turbo-Charged which will be headlined by-“ She would point to a hand raised in the small and dreading who it belonged to.

“David Meltz for The Wrestling Onlooker, are you sure it’s wise to have another event so soon after your last one, I mean isn’t your former SUPER Champion still injured?”

_David Meltz, head writer and founder of The Wrestling Onlooker was the “go-to source” for wrestling news from behind the scenes, it was rumored that his sources from inside the League itself were responsible for breaking the story on the corruption scandal by former general manager Damien Black._

“Yes, and we wish Mr. Arc a speedy recovery from the injuries he incurred at Bullet In The Chamber, but seeing as we’re marching closer to our third annual Wrestle-Festival we believe the show must go on.” _Hifumi would give the nod to 21 to turn on the hologram projector where the graphics for the first match were displayed._ “Our first match announced for the show was originally meant to be a one-on-one match seeing Arnett Mcmillan challenging current champion Makoto Niijima for the Women’s Championship, but as you can see there’s been a change.” _The graphic would shift to include a third individual, at first displayed to be a silhouette before shifting to reveal occasional competitor Sarada Uchiha._

“Oliver Gray for WrestleGab, we haven’t seen that particular competitor since True Destiny back in November. Just what the heck has she done to earn inclusion in this matchup _?”_

_The footage from Monday’s Ballroom Blitz weekly show would begin to play as Ruby Rose stood face to face with the new SUPER Champion, the former looking infuriated._

“We both know Jaune shouldn’t have been in that match, do the right thing and give him a rematch at Wrestle-Festival!” _The crimsonette-haired girl was doing her best to keep her emotions in check, even as the champ just gives her a coldhearted glare._

“Jauney-boy knew the risks when he stepped inside the Chamber, him getting shit-stomped isn’t my problem. As for a rematch? This isn’t the WWE, no automatic rematch clauses here. He needs to earn that shit just like I did!” _Roujiro would shoulder check the red-hooded girl as he left the ring, although he would stop as the rest of Team RWBY appeared on the entrance ramp._

“I was hoping we could be civil about this but..you just had to piss me off!!!!” _The other three women would jump the raven-haired young man before he could even think of a way out, the Huntresses laying in the boots before help would arrive from the back to stop the beatdown._ “He deserves this! He deserves this and MORE!!!” _A loud roar would fill the arena as Jack Cayman stomped his way down the ramp, slugging the few unfortunate souls who dared to stand in his way before dragging the battered champion up by his hair and throwing him against the ring post._

“My God, Cayman’s been incensed since being eliminated in the Chamber match! He’s gonna kill the lad- wa-wait a minute! Someone just jumped out of the crowd, I can’t tell who it is!” _The camera would shift to reveal Sarada doing her best to stand between an infuriated Cayman and a downed Roujiro. “_ Somebody get security down here dammit!” _Lead commentator Jackson Prowell was known for his high-strung Jim Ross-esque commentary style, now with the dismissal of Kurt Michelob he was a one-man vocal tour-de-force of emotion._

“Alright that’s enough of that! Consider yourself suspended Jacky-boy, same for you three twats. You can all kiss Wrestle-Festival goodbye.” _A less-than-thrilled Android 21 would make her way down to the ring with a contract in hand as she kneeled to Sarada, ignoring the puzzled look on the younger woman’s face._ “I’ve seen you in the crowd a few times already, and I can tell you have the itch to compete. Sign it and-“ _Sarada would waste very little time in signing the contract in front of her, much to the redhead’s glee._

“Get me a goddamn ref, I believe it’s time I handed out another “Unique Opportunity”: Ruby Rose, you sit your pretty little ass in that ring, because your up against-“ _She would pause to check the name on the contract before smirking._ “Sarada Uchiha..welcome back.”

_The murmurs in the small press conference crowd would reek of disapproval as the match played out in clip form before them._

“You’re kidding me, you gave an unknown in the crowd a contract **on the spot** before allowing her to compete against a more experience competitor in Ruby Rose???” _Meltz would once again be leading the charge when it comes to questions._ “Are you fucking nuts?” _The rest of the journalists would begin to file out, grumbling to themselves._

“This is gonna be a shit show.”

“So much garbage.”

“Black may been a corrupt sleazeball, but he at least knew the business.”

_Hifumi would sigh dejectedly as she stared at the mostly empty conference room, expecting no less from the big name “journalists” considering how well B.I.T.C was rated in the Onlooker with only half a star._

“Well that went well.” _The brunette would stare down at her notes, tempted to rip them in half before noticing that there was still someone sitting in the crowd, forcing herself and her disappointment to the background._ “Umm, we’re done for the day. We’ll e-mail you a copy of the card so have a good day.”

 _“_ Axel Brandt with the Yokio Gazette, I just wanna know one thing: What’re your plans regarding Travis Banks and the Heavyweight Championship?” _A young man wearing a school uniform would slowly approach the podium, looking warily over at Android 21 who seemed just as confused as the commissioner herself._ “The word on Twitter says that Banks is in Germany right now competing in wXw’s 16 Karat tournament, I’m not sure he’ll make it back in time if he’s booked for your show too.”

_This was not good news, if anything it seemed to be the cherry on this shit sundae of a press conference. While her predecessor may have been too busy wetting his dick with the girls in the back to contest the Kiwi Buzzsaw’s loaded schedule and lack of appearances, that had been the first thing on her agenda upon stepping into the office._

“Look kid, I’m sure you’re just doing your job trying to get a scoop for this “Yokio Gazette” of yours but we’ll release a statement regarding the championship this evening.” _21 would do her best to start shooing the aspiring newsie out the door, now was not the time for management, now was the time for shots._

_Lots of shots._

“Hold that thought. Maybe it’s my turn to give out a ‘unique opportunity’” _Hifumi would calmly step down from the podium and make her way over to the surprised schoolboy and her redheaded associate. “_ How am I looking kid, camera ready?” _The boy would blush slightly before getting out his cellphone and pointing the camera at the two leading authorities in the outlaw promotion._

“Th-this is Axel Brandt for the Yokio Gazette, I’m standing here at the Nero Kandy Conference Hall with Blitz League promoter Hifumi Togo and General Manager, Android 21 with news regarding this Sunday’s Turbo-Charged event!” _The boy’s exuberance was clear to both women as they gave professional looking smiles to the camera._

“Yes, this Sunday is going to be a wild one as we have three championships on the line as well as the Semi-Finals in our Television Championship Tournament, as well as an appearance by WWE United Kingdom Champion Pete Dunne, and even a referee stepping into the ring to compete.” _The red-haired woman had to fight back a chortle on the absurdity of that last one, but she would be spared any scrutiny as the focus shifted to her boss._

“Now there’s been a heavy focus upon absentee Champion Travis Banks whose last title defense was in January against current Television Champion TJ Combo, and word has it that this weekend he’ll be competing overseas and may be unable to make Sunday’s event. Do you have any comment towards the “Kiwi Buzzsaw’s lack of commitment toward the company?”

_Hifumi would force herself to take a breath before staring straight into the camera._

“We at the Blitz League understand that our guest wrestlers such as Travis tend to have very busy schedules, as such we’re willing to work with them in this regard.” _She would place her hands behind her back to avoid anyone seeing them clench into fists. “_ However; when one of those individuals is in possession of one of our championships we expect some measure of reliability and promptness with these individuals. We’ve been given such promptness by the likes of such names as BT Gunn, “The Iron Man” Joe Coffey, “The Prestigious One” Joe Hendry, and Eli Drake to name a few. Which makes what I’m about to say that much more upsetting.”

_She could feel the camera focusing intently on her, as well as the worried gaze of her partner beginning to weigh her down. But now wasn’t the time to let the inmates run the asylum._

_Not anymore._

“Effective immediately, Travis Banks is hereby stripped of the Heavyweight Championship. A new champion will be crowned in a Justice Five Match featuring the following competitors: “The World Keeper” Lyndis, Neopolitan, Mana Kawai, Puru Two, and the returning Kite Tenjo.” _She felt 21’s hand clutching her shoulder as if to say “Don’t do it.” “_ The winner of that match will go on to defend the belt in the main event of Wrestle Festival III against the winner of January’s Battle Royale, the leader of the Filthy Animalz, Fuu Houoji.” _Hifumi would walk off before any further questions would be asked, it was going to be the dawn of her empire. Where she was the law, and no one could say otherwise._

Blitz League Turbo-Charged

  1. Arnett McMillan vs. Sarada Uchiha vs. Makoto Niijima (Three Way Dance for the Blitz League Women’s Championship)
  2. Mila vs. Neon Katt (Singles Match for the Blitz League International Championship)
  3. Shun Kazami vs. BUSHI (Semifinals Match in the Television Championship Tournament)
  4. THE METAL (Members TBA) vs. The Undisputed (Chie Satonaka & Yukiko Amagi) (Blitz League Tag Team Championship)
  5. Neon Katt vs. Julia Munberk (Semifinals Match in the Television Championship Tournament)
  6. Chaud Blaze vs. Saki Tsuzura (Special Enforcer: Pete Dunne)
  7. Morgan Chase vs. Hinoka (Wrestler vs. Referee)
  8. “The World Keeper” Lyndis vs. Neopolitan vs. Mana Kawai vs. Puru Two vs. Kite Tenjo (Justice Five Match to crown a new Blitz League Heavyweight Champion)




	8. Turbo-Charged Fallout (Night One)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yet another event takes place, new champs are crowned, a kitty is injured, and a referee cowers after winning.

**_And now, for something a little different_ **

 

Neon would limp her way to the back past gorilla position, her knee was still killing her from her first match of the night, and even though she had managed to advance to the Finals of the Television Championship, it had come at the cost of the International Championship.

“Neon Katt, definitely a bittersweet night for you, losing the International Championship-“ The feline Faunus would hold a hand up to this nameless person’s face, backstage personalities weren’t exactly a new thing but she was in a bit of pain and no mood to act like her normal chatty self.

“Yeah, it sucks that some MMA loving bitch tries to break my KNEE just to prove a point but let’s look at the bright side here: One more win, and I get the chance to make TJ Combo my bitch on the greatest of the Outlaws stages.” Neon would hold be holding up a single finger to emphasize her point before looking over and seeing something that made her smile bitterly.

“You should really ice that knee there kitty,otherwise you won’t be in any shape to dance on whatever stripper pole you came from.” The new champ; Mila, was an aspiring Mixed Martial Artist without a cage who was picked up before the League was even on anybody’s radar and was the promotion’s very first International Champion. “Besides, the only one fit to beat TJ is me.” The cocky fighter would saunter off with a smirk, before quickly turning around and viciously kicking the feline in her weakened knee and laughing as the usually peppy girl toppled to the ground screaming in agony.

            “Good luck in the finals loser~”

* * * * *

Hinoka could still feel her heart threatening to beat out of her chest as she laid her head back against the cool brick wall, the roar of the crowd still wringing in her ears as she tried to come to grips with what she hoped was her only match in the league.

“Holy shit, I can’t believe I actually beat that raving psycho!” The red-headed woman could barely contain her squeals of excitement, before remembering just how livid her opponent was upon hearing the unexpected three-count. “I FUCKING WON!”

“Careful now, she’s still tearing up the backstage looking for you.” She would look over suddenly to see the current SUPER Champion leaning against the wall lazily, his title nowhere to be found. “Morgan really can’t stand losing, especially since Primate and Havok aren’t around to help her..relieve stress.” The raven-haired young man would shudder before scrunching his face in disgust, not noticing the apparent “eep!” from the referee turned temporary wrestler.

“DON’T scare me like that dammit! The redhead would breathe a sigh of relief before resting her head on her knees, once again trying to calm her heightened heart rate before standing up and facing the lounging Roujiro. “C’mon, I need to go get my stuff from the back and YOU’RE coming with me!” Hinoka would grab the startled teen’s wrist and dragging him to his feet before shoving him ahead of her. “C’mon c’mon, move your ass!”

“Wha-hey! Why am I being forced to play bodyguard, you knew the risks when you signed up to fight Morgan!” The suicidally-inclined champion would forcibly be moved forward despite his protests, neither side willing to relent to the other even as the pair slowly but surely made their way to the locker rooms.

* * * * *

_The Confessional Room lies in shambles as the seven members of THE METAL either stood or knelt on either side of their vaunted leader: The One Who Laughs._

“We’ve done all we can by biding our time, eviscerating the morsels of scraps that you call Jobbers, we waited and watched as the mantle of leadership passed from one fool to another even as the championships themselves seemed to drift from owner to owner like leaves on the wind.”

The others would laugh in agreement, two of these people holding the Blitz League Tag Team Championships over their shoulders as their leader holds out their arms in a welcoming gesture.

“Bring us your Satisfaction, your War Dogs, your…Ingobernables, we welcome any and all challengers from anywhere in this world or others. The outcome will be the same no matter who appears before us, and they will learn what the now “Disputed” know:

“All roads lead to Darkness!”

_The camera lens would be covered in blood as each of the members each spew some of the crimson-colored liquid._

“Tadaa-hahahaHAHAHA!!!!!”

* * * * *

The echoes of laughter would reach all the way to the locker room area, further unnerving an already tense Hinoka as she quickly packed up her belongings even as her still unwilling protector stood outside of the Ladies locker room.

“D’jya hear about Neon, I hear her knee is messed up bad.”

“Guess it’s down to Shun and BUSHI now, which means we’re either getting jumped by Los Ingobernables or Suzuki-GUN by the end of the week…again.”

“Good riddance, she was an annoying brat anyhow.”

Hinoka would facepalm as she overheard the other women chat amongst themselves; it was bad enough that they were celebrating the potential injury of one of their own, but the thought of another Japanese faction invasion meant everyone was liable to get their asses kicked for shits and giggles.

“Oh crap, not like this!” The sounds of fighting outside would startle the redhead into zipping up her bag and running out the back, seeing her car waiting in the parking lot and breathing a sigh of relief. “Sorry kid, survival of the fittest! Besides, this whole place is going to Hell anyhow.” She would slam her foot down on the gas pedal and burn rubber outta the arena, besides there were two other refs to pick up the slack in light of her absence.

Night One results:

Mila def. Neon Katt via Submission (New Champion)

THE METAL (Murder Machine & The Devastator) def. The Undisputed (Chie Satonaka & Yukiko Amagi) (New Champions crowned)

Neon Katt def. Julia Munberk (Katt advances to Tournament Finals)

Hinoka def. Morgan Chase


	9. Turbo-Charged Fallout (Night Two)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A new champion is crowned, another questions her morals, a competitor gets taken to the "Principal's Office", and the finalists for the TV title do shit

Makoto could barely breath as she stood under the ice-cold water of the showers, the welts had already begun forming on her body due to the intensity of the match she had endured.

“The kid held her own good enough, but that woman..Arnett, she was a goddamn monster.” Her ribs would ache as she played back the events that transpired post-Sarada’s elimination…

The announcement of her first opponent’s defeat barely had time to register with Niijima before she felt something hit her in the back, sending her to the mat as she instinctively covered up for protection.

“So, this is the one that’s got my student all flustered, pretty disappointing if you couldn’t even anticipate a simple strike to the back!” She heard s very inhumane snarl from her opponent before lashing out with a closed fist, ignoring the warning of the referee as she kept swinging her fist for all it was worth. “Thank you, ma’am, may I have another?” Arnett’s response would horrify Queen, whose fist was killing her after those repeated shots.

Then she felt a hard smack to the face, sending her back a few steps as she leaned against the ropes for support. “ _Wh-what the hell was that? Did she sneak some kind of weapon in?”_ Another flurry of strikes would interrupt her train of thoughts, human beings shouldn’t be able to hit this hard with slaps!

“C’mon champ! You can’t handle a little Strong Style?” The redhead would lick her lips before shoving the ref aside and continuing the beating with stiff kicks to Makoto’s ribs, instantly regretting having once again donning the dancing outfit again as she was exposed to such brutality. “Weak. Weak. Weak!” Arnett would level a knee to the battered champion’s face, sending the brunette sprawling out of the ring as the referee’s ten count began.

“ _Maybe I should stay down, it wouldn’t be too bad taking a count out victory. She gets to think she won while I waltz away with the prize and another free meal, especially since he’s paying again.”_ The count was already up to five (even though the crowd was annoyingly chant “ten” with every count), and it certainly seemed like a less painful alternative to her current situation. “ _Fuck it, I’m out.”_ Makoto would struggle to her feet as she limped her way towards the entrance ramp, let Arnett have the match. At the end of the day, she would still be Queen of this division.

“Go ahead and run you whore, that’s about all you and that silly little outfit are good for anyhow!” Arnett would kick the bottom rope in frustration, mostly because the ref was taking her sweet ass time getting to ten. “You’re no woman, you’re just some tramp with connections! Your sister probably did a lot of laying on her back too!”

Red.

The world was suddenly going red as the woman’s words hit home, her sister had busted her ass in the legal field to get where she was. Makoto herself had gone from being one of Damien Black’s War Dogs to be a legitimate threat to anyone who stood across from her in that ring, she was a Queen, she was **the** Queen, and it was time to make this bitch bow down.

  _“She wants Strong Style? Fine, time to dust this skank!”_ The brunette would grit her teeth and charge back into the squared circle, ignoring the kicks and stomps that were being dealt to tackle her to the ground and lay into Arnett with forearm strikes. “How’s that feel? Strong enough for ya?!” Her query would be rewarded with a wad of spit to the face before suddenly finding herself being hit again, the champion’s vision blurring as she tried to recover.

“Not bad princess, but that’s day one bullshit any young lion is taught!” Arnett would snarl as she laid in with a slap to the chest, sending Niijima down to her side with a howl of pain as she struggled to her feet. “Now how ‘bout we dance?”

What followed next was a ballet of brutality, the challenger laying in the stiff strikes that were well known in the ring of New Japan: neither side relenting as their usual soft-hearted blows now became laced with malice, the crowd “ooh’ing” and “ahh’ing as the echoing sounds of elbows and knees connecting with flesh. Two women were showing that their battle could be just as horrific as any man’s war, beautiful faces were bound to be disfigured by tomorrow’s welts and bruises but in this moment, there was only an enemy to be conquered.

And she would do it, with her trusty right hand.

“I hate to admit it, but you’re not too shabby. Maybe once I take the belt off you, I can put in a good word at the dojo’s, with a little polish you can actually be something great someday.” Arnett would quickly sweep the legs out from under the exhausted champion, taking a few steps and winding herself up for a Penalty Kick. “Say goodnight princess!” The redhead would rush forward, her eyes sparkling as she saw her road to Wrestle Festival set out before her.

Back in reality however, a very different outcome was set to occur.

“ _Gotta time this right!”_ Makoto would barely have time to think as she laid down on the mat, the kick connecting with nothing but air as she scrambled to her feet and pulled down on her right glove and smirking as the padding inside turned heavy. _“Fuck you!”_ The Queen would quickly connect with a wicked right hand, pulling on the glove again as her opponent fell to the ground in a lifeless heap as the padding returned to normal. “And FUCK STRONG STYLE!!!” She would quickly cover the fallen Arnett as the three count was made, her victory was assured along with her spot at Wrestle Festival…

 _“Did I do the right thing? I threw everything a had at that brute and she wouldn’t stay down, so what if I had to load my glove with something extra?!”_ She would wince as she tried to draw in a deep breath, deciding to turn off the cold water and sit down with her head in her hands. “ _I’m making the same mistakes sis did: win at any cost, rig things in my favor. I really am no better.”_

* * * * *

For Saki Tsuzura, the match she had was just supposed to be a way for her to get back at Chaud for his unnecessary white knighting. She could’ve gotten payback on Dunne for jumping her on Thursday and taking her spot in the Championship Qualifier, but instead that dummy Blaze decided to play hero.

21 had decided to pit the pair into a grudge match, while unknowingly making her assailant the “special enforcer”.

“What on God’s green Earth were you thinking Saki?! Pete was a guest, he wasn’t assigned as a competitor!!!” Android 21 would tug at her red locks furiously as the footage of Saki landing a suicide dive on the United Kingdom champion before the bell could even ring for her actual match, screaming bloody murder even as officials tried to separate her and the downed enforcer. “Do you realize how lucky you are that the WWE isn’t coming down on us with a fucking lawsuit?!”

“You forgot the part where I managed to be that goofball Chaud by the way, really think that’s the more important issue here boss.” The azure-haired girl would smirk, already having a Wrestle Festival target in mind as she watched herself shoulder check a departing Makoto Niijima on her way to the ring. “I think that should put me on the road to a championship after all.”

21 would just stare at the girl with a look of pure disgust, before pointing towards the door.

“Out. Now!”

* * * * *

One step closer.

The black death mask known as BUSHI was one step closer towards achieving his goal of settling things with that bastard Combo, he had already held a win over the man in a non-title match, but T.J. had gotten a lucky shot in when the belt was put on the line allowing him to run away with what should have been **his** championship.

This time though, things would be different. His opponent for the Finals was rumored to be hurt, nearly ensuring that his path to vengeance would be a smooth one.

Although that information hadn’t stopped him from reaching out to a fellow _Ingobernable_ , and with Hiromu’s help he finally unseat the overconfident champion and show just how dangerous their group could be.

He would smile as he stood in front of the picture of TJ Combo holding the gold, this crazy little promotion had a tradition of hanging photos of their current champions on the wall. Although judging by the three empty spaces, last night had been an eventful one.

 _“_ _Sugu ni, chanpionshippu wa watashi no mono ni narudeshou! Soshite anata no TJ konbo ni tsuite wa, dare mo arainagasa renaideshou!_ “

BUSHI spit a fine spray of colored mist over his hated rival’s photo knowing that one day it would be the man’s face.

That mist would be the last thing TJ would see before suffering a humiliating defeat.

* * * * *

Neo would calmly watch as the name plate for her newly won championship was screwed in carefully, the custom side plates would be next of course.

Not that it mattered of course, the championship was just a means to an end. What she really wanted was that red-hooded brat, because of her meddling, the only family she had ever known was dead and gone.

“Congratulations Miss, you really showed that big surprises really do come in small packages.” The craftsman would hand her the newly created Heavyweight Championship, this one was much more bejeweled than the one that the Kiwi was keeping in his possession. “Please don’t break my arm too champ” The man would give the Neopolitan-haired girl a playful wink before turning away, unaware of the malicious smile adorning the young woman’s face.

The night air would suddenly be filled with the sound of a sickening snap before the new champ would make her way outside with a knowing smirk, she had kept her promise after all.

The man never said anything about not breaking his neck.

* * * * *

Neon would stare at the ceiling of the trainer’s room, her knee was thoroughly covered in ice packs as she wondered just who she would be meeting in the finals.

“Hey, you ever wonder why we’re here?” She would sigh, knowing that the bulky man responsible for mending their wounds was unable to answer her question due to his condition as a mute. “Like, is any of this really worth it?” The feline would wince as a dull ache could still be felt, it was going to hurt like hell for a while, but it would all be worth the agony once she knocked Combo flat on his ass.

“Ya know the old saying kitten, don’t sweat the small stuff and just enjoy the ride.” She would look over just in time to see a bag of fast food heading in her direction, catching it with a sigh before seeing that her delivery boy was perhaps the most obnoxious of the League’s champions. “This is the part where you say Thank You.” Roujiro would give a half-hearted smile, now sporting a fancy new shiner over his left eye.

“Who kicked your ass, thought you were Hifumi’s golden boy.” She would peer inside the bag to see Five Guys burgers and fries resting inside, the wondrous smell from the food causing her stomach to growl. “This is a bribe isn’t it?” Despite her apparent apathy, she would still happily dig into the food with gusto.

“Not really? I was kinda hoping to ask you out.” He would wince as the feline spit out her fries in shock before staring at him with wide-eyed shock, although he was more surprised to see the mute mostly unfazed by all of this. “Gee, is it that awful a thought?”

“Nonononono, I never said that! I just thought that you and Makoto were a thing?” She would frown in thought even as she searched the bag for more fries but found nothing but a waiting burger. “I mean you two have been together every night for crying out loud!”

The raven-haired champ would sigh before facepalming and digging into his own bag for fries of his own. “Yeah, because she keeps wearing that stupid outfit.” He was halfway towards stuffing his mouth with fries when he noticed the irritated look on the Faunus’s face. “Right, bit of context here: I made a half-assed bet that every time she wears that ridiculous outfit I’d pay for her meal, that’s all it is.”

Neon would burst out in a fit of laughter, nearly dropping her burger even as her non-iced leg was flailing along with her. “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard!” She could feel her tail twitching slightly as the laughter subsided, looking over at her now-embarrassed friend. “You’re funny, and I like funny.” Neon would wink as she slowly made her way to a seated position, ignoring the disapproving grunt from the trainer.

“So, that’s a yes?” He would quickly rush to help her stand, stopping once she waved him off and stood up with only the ghost of a wince. “You’re amazing you know that?”

The feline would give him a cocky smile while collecting her burger with a flick of her tail. “You’ve got no idea just how “amazing” I am.” She would chuckle as she noted the slight flush on his cheeks, giving him a knowing smack on the back. “Not like **that** ya perv! I’m better than other girls: I’m cool like the rain, I’m hot like the sun. I’m a neon rainbow.” She would spin around and tap him on the nose suddenly.

“They’re just no fun.”

Night 2 Results

Makoto Niijima def. Sarada Uchiha & Arnett McMillan (Champion Retains)

Saki Tsuzura def. Chaud Blaze

BUSHI def. Shun Kazami to advance to the TV championship tournament finals.

Neopolitan def. “The World Keeper” Lyndis, Mana Kawai, Kite Tenjo, and Puru Two to become the new Heavyweight Champion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The basics of what BUSHI said: The title's gonna be mine, and Combo's going to be a washed up has-been.


	10. Breaking Kayfabe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A brief interruption of this story's events

Umm hello everyone, we’re interrupting this (not-so) regularly scheduled fanfic to pretty much announce something even dumber then the current one running.

I understand that while the Blitz League’s story isn’t read by everyone (or even well up to date.) I wanted to announce the start of a series of fanfics revolving around the WWE.

No, I’m not writing a series of fanfics involving the Superstars of World Wrestling Entertainment. Rather, it’ll be a set of fics featuring a revolving cast of characters watching RAW, Smackdown, NXT, 205 Live, and even the big Network Specials/Pay-Per-Views (meaning my Sunday’s are gonna get stupid busy)

I don’t know if this’ll get much traction here, or if it’ll even be accepted by the wrestling faithful here on AO3 but it’s been my dream to spread the love of wrestling to others (or, just give you something to waste a little time reading if you’re bored) so if you’ll have it, get ready for the following fanfics that WILL BE UPDATED WEEKLY (barring severe weather conditions killing my cable signal, or killing my power):

RAW Deal (4 characters watching Monday Night RAW, all 3 miserable hours of it- expect heavy alcohol use and drunken antics)

Smacked Up, Down, and Around: (A different group of four sitting through Tuesday Night Smackdown, environmentalist champion Daniel Bryan will infuriate someone)

NeXT!!!: (A cast of younger characters sit through WWE’s developmental juggernaut known as NXT, high praise, indy goodness, and- if I’m lucky- getting to bash on Kona Reeves and his furry jacket)

Two Bucks and a Dime: (Not sure what the cast gimmick for this 205 Live Review will be, but if the Lucha House Party gets featured, the cast beats the piss out of a piñata. Because Lucha House Party rules buried The Revival for almost a month, and that’s bullshit!)

Afterhours- (The post Sunday Event show, two characters from RAW Deal and Smacked Up, Down, and Around get together to discuss the happenings of Sunday’s big show, bitch about the events that led up to it, and lament the fallout)

These stories will cover the entirety of WWE’s 2019.

Pray for my sanity people.


End file.
